BUTTERSCOTCH BREENIES

At this moment I'm going to ask for your trust.  And I guarantee it -- your faith will be tested.  :)  But seriously, you're not gonna believe the ingredients in my next concoction and on top of that, you won't believe how motherf***ing awesome it is until you've actually tried it.

Now here goes: This recipe...is for brownies.  These brownies...are made with beans.  That's right.  Beans.  Black beans to be exact.  (Get it -- breenie?  Bean...brownie...?)  And it only has two other ingredients, so you have no excuse not to try it.  Now, if you're saying "WTH, lady?  You really expect me to think brownies with beans don't taste like dog doo?"  Yes.  That's exactly what I'm expecting.  In fact, I'm expecting you to make this your new go-to brownie recipe.  Because if you trust me on this and follow it through, your mind will literally explode.  Still unconvinced?  Well then clearly you can't handle this much awesome.

INGREDIENTS:
1 box brownie mix
1/2 cup butterscotch chips
1 can black beans

DIRECTIONS:
1. Drain liquid from beans and return beans to can.  (I just cut two slits with the can opener and drained it.)  Fill can to the top with water.

2. Pour beans and water in a blender and pulverize the living crap out of it.  Try to eliminate any large pieces.  You should end up with a generally smooth mixture, although you'll still see specks of bean skin in it.  (Relax; it's not going to taste like beans.)

3. In a large bowl, combine bean mixture and brownie mix (I prefer Duncan Hines Dark Chocolate Brownie Mix).  Beat until smooth.

4. Fold in butterscotch chips.

5. Pour into baking dish or pan and bake according to directions on box.  Brownies are done when a fork inserted into the center comes out mostly clean.  These brownies are more on the fudgey side, so they won't be as firm in the center as your average cakey brownie.

And that's it!  No oil, no eggs, and you can store the only three ingredients in your cabinet on the long-term so when you've got a hankerin' for a dessert, everything's a-waitin' for ya.  Plus, if you shop at Target, you're droppin' five, maybe seven bucks max (It's all about the Hamiltons, baby), so you're not out much if you're up for a culinary adventure and don't like it.  And as my dad used to say, don't knock it 'til you've tried it.

Official Grade: A+